Wed, 19 May 2004

top

time traveling

<<reverse < index > forward>>

(Some random scrawlings that I can't seem to make coherent)

Knowing that these are My Last Days in this City makes everything dreamlike and surreal, like I'm waiting for my own personal apocalypse.
The past and present meld together in a spiraling, feedback fashion. As I walk aimlessly across this urban matrix, I orient myself through space with nothing but memories: I pass that patch of sidewalk where he pointed the gun at me. I walk across that parking lot where my buddy took off his shirt and just about took off his pants before we stopped him. I drive down the street where we tried hailing cop cars to take us home. I walk past that club where my other buddy picked up those two women and where we danced countless drunken, sweaty nights—these last memories all blur, smeared by alcohol and repetion.
I try to un-know these past few years, pretend that I am once again caught in the moment, exploring this vast place that I am now familiar with (though I only learned an infinitesimal increment about it)
Knowing that my immediate future lies completely elsewhere, literally half a continent away, it is close to impossible to start anything new. No matter how adventurous I feel, I find myself walking through the same familiar streets, drinking at the same, tired bars. The only difference is that I no longer meet familiar faces.
My own personal, transient history is being erased even before I leave this place for the final time. I realize it is megalomaniacal to expect that I would leave a mark in this place, but the immensity of this city and my insignificance in it bears down on me in this solitary days.
The weather has morphed at least six times since I've been sitting here, recapitulating the seasons, with change to spare. The bright, blue sky of summer, the brooding grey of winter, the deep dark, pregnant rain clouds, the yellow glow of the sunlight gleaming through the breaking bank of clouds.

It's odd, this feeling, that, despite knowing precisely where I'm going to be in the next month (well, not precisely, but about as precise as you can be given the changing tides of Fate, Godel's Law of Incompleteness, and Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle), I feel completely directionless.
It doesn't help that there are a hundred, thousand trivial tasks that pull at me this way and that, these ridiculous loose ends that, like dandelions or gophers, just keep popping up.
It's like this cosmological game of Whack-a-Mole.

I still marvel at the sensation of being completely isolated and disconnected despite being embedded in a rock-and-concrete organism made up of millions of people. Sometimes, much like how motion-sickness and the concomitant nausea can creep up on you, I lose my sea legs and plumb the depths of this seething loneliness. Then I regain my equilibrium and composure, and plunge on dazedly, immune to passion, sorrow, or joy. It's amazing the sorts of things human beings can adapt to.

17:23:02 19 May 2004 > /portents > permalink > 65 comments

comments

Name/Blog: Oyebola
URL: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100003469644782
Title: Jul25 See this is
Comment/Excerpt: Jul25 See this is what i am talking these are the type of Post that is GOD GIFT!!!!WHAT MORE CAN YOU ASK FOR, CAR & HALF NAKED WOMEN!!!!!!!! GOD I love Car life ..

Name/Blog: http://tinyurl.com/quest-bars-cheap-77971
URL: http://tinyurl.com/quest-bars-cheap-77971
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Great post.

Name/Blog: why coconut oil
URL: http://j.mp/2CHZxMM
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Howdy! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a group of volunteers and starting a new initiative in a community in the same niche. Your blog provided us useful information to work on. You have done a wonderful job!

Name/Blog: ps4 games
URL: http://www.servicetech.gr/UserProfile/tabid/43/UserID/348095/Default.aspx
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hello just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The words in your content seem to be running off the screen in Firefox. I'm not sure if this is a formatting issue or something to do with web browser compatibility but I thought I'd post to let you know. The design look great though! Hope you get the problem solved soon. Cheers

Name/Blog: ps4 games
URL: https://ojodu.com/user/profile/2557267
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: whoah this weblog is great i really like reading your posts. Stay up the great work! You recognize, many persons are hunting round for this info, you can help them greatly.

Name/Blog: quest bars cheap
URL: http://tinyurl.com/wd6fj2v
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hi there to all, the contents present at this site are really awesome for people knowledge, well, keep up the good work fellows.

Name/Blog: ps4 games
URL: http://tinyurl.com/vy7f3l8
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Good article. I definitely appreciate this website. Continue the good work!

Name/Blog: ps4 games
URL: http://tinyurl.com/rnfrac4
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hi to every one, for the reason that I am genuinely keen of reading this web site's post to be updated on a regular basis. It contains good material.

Name/Blog: quest bars cheap
URL: http://tinyurl.com/unpvlmu
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you create this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you? Plz answer back as I'm looking to construct my own blog and would like to know where u got this from. thanks

Name/Blog: ps4 games
URL: http://eltobogancr.com/?option=com_k2&view=itemlist&task=user&id=87259-ps4-games
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Great article! This is the type of info that are meant to be shared around the net. Disgrace on Google for no longer positioning this publish upper! Come on over and visit my site . Thank you =)

Name/Blog: coconut oil
URL: http://tinyurl.com/coconut-oil-75545
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Great website you have here but I was wanting to know if you knew of any user discussion forums that cover the same topics talked about here? I'd really like to be a part of community where I can get feed-back from other experienced individuals that share the same interest. If you have any recommendations, please let me know. Cheers!

Name/Blog: sling tv
URL: http://tinyurl.com/sling-tv-58661
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hello, its pleasant post about media print, we all be aware of media is a great source of facts.

Name/Blog: sling tv
URL: http://tinyurl.com/thoqrsn
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Have you ever considered writing an e-book or guest authoring on other sites? I have a blog centered on the same information you discuss and would really like to have you share some stories/information. I know my audience would appreciate your work. If you're even remotely interested, feel free to shoot me an e mail.

Name/Blog: sling tv
URL: http://tinyurl.com/sling-tv-41225
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Thanks for every other informative blog. Where else could I am getting that type of info written in such an ideal approach? I have a mission that I'm just now working on, and I have been on the glance out for such information.

Name/Blog: sling tv
URL: http://tinyurl.com/sling-tv-71338
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hey there! I just want to offer you a big thumbs up for the excellent info you have here on this post. I am returning to your blog for more soon.

Name/Blog: sling tv
URL: http://tinyurl.com/sling-tv-20024
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I like the valuable information you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your blog and check again here regularly. I am quite certain I'll learn plenty of new stuff right here! Best of luck for the next!

Name/Blog: sling tv
URL: http://tinyurl.com/sling-tv-95213
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: When I initially commented I clicked the "Notify me when new comments are added" checkbox and now each time a comment is added I get three e-mails with the same comment. Is there any way you can remove people from that service? Appreciate it!

Name/Blog: cbd oil that works 2020
URL: https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/cannabidiol-cbd-what-we-know-and-what-we-dont-2018082414476
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Howdy, I think your site may be having web browser compatibility problems. Whenever I take a look at your website in Safari, it looks fine however, when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping issues. I simply wanted to provide you with a quick heads up! Apart from that, great blog!

Name/Blog: website hosting companies
URL: http://tinyurl.com/y2tqr4z6
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Superb website you have here but I was curious about if you knew of any discussion boards that cover the same topics talked about here? I'd really like to be a part of community where I can get feedback from other knowledgeable individuals that share the same interest. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. Thank you!

Name/Blog: web hosting companies
URL: http://center4familyservices.com/music-is-a-part-that-is-big-of-years-got-passed-away-but-audio-lasted-and-even-expanded-to-deeper-levels-every-decade-that-is-single-as-a-matter-of-fact-the-demand-of-tunes-has-become-increasing-e/
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hi, Neat post. There's an issue together with your website in internet explorer, may test this? IE nonetheless is the market chief and a large part of other people will miss your wonderful writing due to this problem.

Name/Blog: best web hosting sites
URL: http://t.co/gZNHOBR7xf
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I have read so many content regarding the blogger lovers however this piece of writing is genuinely a pleasant article, keep it up.

Name/Blog: web hosting company
URL: http://j.mp/2PNanHX
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: It's an remarkable paragraph in support of all the web viewers

Name/Blog: cheap flights
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yxbtnhp7
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I like the helpful info you provide to your articles. I'll bookmark your weblog and check once more right here regularly. I'm relatively certain I will be informed lots of new stuff right here! Best of luck for the following!

Name/Blog: cheap flights
URL: https://tinyurl.com/y3mxyqdf
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: certainly like your web-site however you need to test the spelling on several of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very bothersome to inform the reality nevertheless I'll certainly come again again. cheap flights 2CSYEon

Name/Blog: cheap flights
URL: http://small-things.net/?URL=checkcheapflights.com
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: A fascinating discussion is definitely worth comment. There's no doubt that that you ought to write more about this issue, it might not be a taboo matter but typically people do not speak about such subjects. To the next! Many thanks!!

Name/Blog: black mass
URL: http://tinyurl.com/y4m9pfy4
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Do you have any video of that? I'd want to find out some additional information.

Name/Blog: mobile legends hack app
URL: https://www.google.com.sl/url?q=https://www.getjar.com/categories/all-games/action-games/Mobile-Legends-Tool-Mod-940071
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I need to to thank you for this wonderful read!! I certainly loved every little bit of it. I have you book marked to look at new stuff you post…

Name/Blog: link
URL: http://www.hammer.if.tv/cgi/search/rank.cgi?mode=link&id=5028&url=https://tinyurl.com/yabx85tp
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Appreciate this post. Let me try it out.

Name/Blog: Lea
URL: http://www.horvatorszagielszallasolas.hu/cklikwww_ptx.php?id=14745&redirect_to=https://tinyurl.com/y72gtbh6
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: This design is spectacular! You obviously know how to keep a reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost...HaHa!) Great job. I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

Name/Blog: Billy
URL: http://sayyac.mynet.com/tiklama/393?url=https://tinyurl.com/y8cn6zky
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I simply could not go away your website prior to suggesting that I extremely enjoyed the usual information an individual provide for your visitors? Is gonna be again ceaselessly to check out new posts

Name/Blog: Francisca
URL: http://8641001.net/rank.cgi?mode=link&id=83&url=https://tinyurl.com/ybstp3tr
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I am regular visitor, how are you everybody? This paragraph posted at this site is genuinely pleasant.

Name/Blog: Vallie
URL: http://go.iprim.ru/?url=https://tinyurl.com/y9p4poje
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: It's awesome in favor of me to have a website, which is valuable designed for my know-how. thanks admin

Name/Blog: link
URL: http://www.fajiao.org/go.php?go=tinyurl.com%2Fyax9zuxl
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hmm it seems like your site ate my first comment (it was super long) so I guess I'll just sum it up what I submitted and say, I'm thoroughly enjoying your blog. I too am an aspiring blog writer but I'm still new to the whole thing. Do you have any suggestions for newbie blog writers? I'd certainly appreciate it.

Name/Blog: Mac
URL: http://www.hrvatska.sk/cklikwww_ptx.php?id=35&redirect_to=https://tinyurl.com%2Fydd3oxfk/
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hey there would you mind letting me know which web host you're utilizing? I've loaded your blog in 3 different web browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot quicker then most. Can you recommend a good internet hosting provider at a reasonable price? Thank you, I appreciate it!

Name/Blog: cheap flights
URL: http://tinyurl.com/y2zrrgrf
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Nice post. I learn something totally new and challenging on blogs I stumbleupon on a daily basis. It will always be interesting to read through articles from other writers and practice a little something from their web sites.

Name/Blog: popaholics.net
URL: http://popaholics.net/index.php?action=profile
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Great post however , I was wanting to know if you could write a litte more on this subject? I'd be very grateful if you could elaborate a little bit more. Many thanks!

Name/Blog: http://tinyurl.com/
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yg4hno2u
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I've been exploring for a little bit for any high quality articles or weblog posts on this sort of house . Exploring in Yahoo I finally stumbled upon this website. Studying this info So i'm glad to express that I have a very good uncanny feeling I discovered exactly what I needed. I most indisputably will make sure to do not omit this website and provides it a glance on a continuing basis. ps4 games 185413490784 ps4 games

Name/Blog: ps4 games
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yey3ezp9
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: My brother recommended I might like this website. He was entirely right. This post actually made my day. You cann't imagine just how much time I had spent for this info! Thanks!

Name/Blog: web hosting
URL: http://tinyurl.com/bcmxv66u
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Greetings from Ohio! I'm bored to tears at work so I decided to browse your blog on my iphone during lunch break. I really like the knowledge you present here and can't wait to take a look when I get home. I'm amazed at how fast your blog loaded on my cell phone .. I'm not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyhow, very good site!

Name/Blog: web hosting
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yh9qphbb
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: If you want to grow your experience just keep visiting this site and be updated with the latest gossip posted here.

Name/Blog: tinyurl.com
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yjcth2y4
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hi there! This blog post couldn't be written any better! Looking at this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept preaching about this. I'll send this information to him. Pretty sure he's going to have a very good read. Thank you for sharing!

Name/Blog: 0mniartist
URL: http://0mniartist.tumblr.com
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: May I simply just say what a comfort to find someone that truly knows what they're talking about on the web. You definitely understand how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More and more people really need to look at this and understand this side of the story. I was surprised you're not more popular given that you definitely have the gift. asmr 0mniartist

Name/Blog: 0mniartist
URL: http://0mniartist.tumblr.com
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Howdy just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The text in your post seem to be running off the screen in Ie. I'm not sure if this is a formatting issue or something to do with internet browser compatibility but I thought I'd post to let you know. The design and style look great though! Hope you get the problem solved soon. Many thanks asmr 0mniartist

Name/Blog: is gamefly
URL: http://images.google.com/url?q=http://0mniartist.tumblr.com
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: This article will assist the internet visitors for creating new weblog or even a weblog from start to end.

Name/Blog: bitly.com
URL: http://bitly.com/33ASumF
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: If you would like to grow your knowledge only keep visiting this web page and be updated with the most recent news posted here.

Name/Blog: why asmr
URL: http://bit.ly/3baNk4F
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Thank you a lot for sharing this with all of us you actually understand what you are talking approximately! Bookmarked. Kindly additionally discuss with my site =). We can have a hyperlink trade agreement between us

Name/Blog: https://785days.tumblr.com/
URL: https://785days.tumblr.com/
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: dating sites I'm impressed, I must say. Rarely do I come across a blog that's equally educative and amusing, and let me tell you, you have hit the nail on the head. The issue is something too few people are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I found this in my search for something relating to this. dating sites https://785days.tumblr.com/

Name/Blog: your free dating sites
URL: http://bbs.zhichihuodong.com/home.php?mod=space&uid=5874752&do=profile&from=space
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Valuable info. Lucky me I discovered your web site by accident, and I am surprised why this coincidence didn't took place in advance! I bookmarked it.

Name/Blog: the dating sites
URL: http://issiqnon.com/index.php?page=user&action=pub_profile&id=108296
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Tremendous issues here. I'm very satisfied to look your post. Thank you a lot and I'm taking a look forward to contact you. Will you kindly drop me a mail?

Name/Blog: dating sites why
URL: http://bit.ly/3p0cmJt
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: you're in point of fact a excellent webmaster. The web site loading speed is incredible. It sort of feels that you're doing any distinctive trick. Furthermore, The contents are masterpiece. you've performed a magnificent activity in this matter!

Name/Blog: http://tinyurl.com
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yxzozxvy
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: It's enormous that you are getting thoughts from this paragraph as well as from our argument made at this time.

Name/Blog: tinyurl.com
URL: http://tinyurl.com/y3d6jgbo
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: May I just say what a comfort to uncover a person that actually understands what they're discussing on the web. You definitely realize how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More and more people need to check this out and understand this side of your story. I was surprised that you're not more popular since you definitely possess the gift.

Name/Blog: tinyurl.com
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yed6np89
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: It's in reality a great and helpful piece of information. I'm satisfied that you simply shared this useful information with us. Please stay us informed like this. Thanks for sharing.

Name/Blog: j.mp
URL: http://j.mp/2VMfEW8
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hey! Someone in my Myspace group shared this site with us so I came to give it a look. I'm definitely enjoying the information. I'm bookmarking and will be tweeting this to my followers! Exceptional blog and brilliant style and design.

Name/Blog: tinyurl.com
URL: http://tinyurl.com/ye4j7wqs
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Does your website have a contact page? I'm having a tough time locating it but, I'd like to shoot you an e-mail. I've got some suggestions for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it grow over time.

Name/Blog: bit.ly
URL: http://bit.ly/3CQEO7i
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Amazing! Its in fact remarkable article, I have got much clear idea regarding from this paragraph.

Name/Blog: ps4 games our
URL: http://tinyurl.com/ddpx4yy
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hey I know this is off topic but I was wondering if you knew of any widgets I could add to my blog that automatically tweet my newest twitter updates. I've been looking for a plug-in like this for quite some time and was hoping maybe you would have some experience with something like this. Please let me know if you run into anything. I truly enjoy reading your blog and I look forward to your new updates.

Name/Blog: what asmr
URL: http://bitly.com/3gN9KMs
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hi, I read your blog regularly. Your humoristic style is awesome, keep doing what you're doing!

Name/Blog: scoliosis surgery an
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yg9pbu8f
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Do you have a spam issue on this website

Name/Blog: http://j.mp/3nkdKIi
URL: http://j.mp/3nkdKIi
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: This post is priceless. How can I find out more? ps4 https://bitly.com/3z5HwTp ps4 games

Name/Blog: coub.com
URL: http://coub.com/stories/962966-scoliosis-surgery
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: We're a group of volunteers and starting a new scheme in our community. Your site offered us with valuable information to work on. You've done an impressive job and our entire community will be grateful to you. scoliosis surgery https://coub.com/stories/962966-scoliosis-surgery scoliosis surgery

Name/Blog: ps4 games are
URL: http://tinyurl.com/yho5lpug
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Does your website have a contact page? I'm having trouble locating it but, I'd like to send you an e-mail. I've got some ideas for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it improve over time.

Name/Blog: when asmr
URL: http://tinyurl.com/y2epttl2
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I all the time emailed this blog post page to all my friends, because if like to read it after that my links will too.

Name/Blog: Twosday 2 22 22 Shirt
URL: http://datasciencemetabase.com/index.php/Twosday_2_22_22_Shirt_Warning:_These_9_Errors_Will_Destroy_Your_Shirt
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: Hurrah, that's what I was searching for, what a information! existing here at this blog, thanks admin of this site. https://beauval.co.uk/index.php/Twosday_Shirt_What_You_Need_To_Have_Asked_Your_Teachers_About_Shirt_Design https://peace.myserenity.net/doku.php?id=taco_twosday_t_shi_t_shi_ts_fo_men_-_what_can_you_be_taught_out_of https://relysys-wiki.com/index.php?title=User:TresaFromm7838 http://xn--l8jb9a5f2d3e.com/index.php/Taco_Twosday_T_Shirt_It%E2%80%99s_Simple_To_Get_T-Shirt_Printing_In_Birmingham http://wiki.gruenermarkt.at/index.php/Twosday_Shirt_Non-Iron_Gown_Shirts_Are_The_Worst https://epicgamers.xyz/index.php/Twosday_The_Whole_Lot_You_Must_Know_About_Versatile_T_Shirt_Bra_-_Vogue

Name/Blog: twosday shirt
URL: https://apsh.info/other-languages/taco-twosday-tee-shirt-the-place-can-you-discover-free-shirt-resources.html
Title:
Comment/Excerpt: I do not even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was great. I don't know who you are but certainly you're going to a famous blogger if you are not already

Comment form

Name:
URL/Email:
[http://... or mailto:you@w...] (optional)
Title:
(optional)
Comments:
Save my Name and URL/Email for next time
To prevent comment spam, please retype the characters in this image
Enter the text here: